23.10.2012

He's losing hope to finished up his PhD. That year should be his last year.

He's losing hope to keep up with the 'game'. It took him 7 'tough' years to survived since his last major operation, of what the doctor said he had only 20% chance at that time.

15.10.2011

23.10.2011

23.10.2012

He left us a year ago, a week before his 53th birthday. If he was alive today, he'll be 54.

Al-Fatihah.

I felt like there's a big hole in my heart, right now...

Dream

I dreamt of me late dad last night. I told him I'm in Melbourne now and that I was sponsored. He said he's so very proud of me and gave me a hug.

I knew it was the right thing to do because I got Allah guiding me.

:'(

Please bear with me. 15.10.12, a year has passed since I last saw me dad.

P.O.D. 1979-1997

Since me dad passed away, I started to have this 'feeling' over death. It's an overwhelmed feeling, full of compassionate to those who have lost their beloved one. It's like I too can feel the pain and the loss that they've felt. Because I know the exact feeling of that. And I have the right to say that "I've been there".

So when I read this one post from mental_floss, I can feel that familiar 'feeling' again. :'(

He Took a Polaroid  Every Day, Until the Day He Died

PHOTO OF THE DAY: 1979 - 1997

Al-Fatihah to me late dad.

Grilled Salmon, Baked Potatoes and Dill Sauce

I think the ultimate perk of having a husband who loves (and rajin) to cook good food is that you can always be fed with good food. I am thankful to Allah! Definitely. I was born and raised in a family that loves to cook and eat and indulge other people with good food. Me dad was a really good cook. Ayam percik, nasi minyak, gulai lemak, you tell me, those were all beyond words to described. Me mum's too. Her sambal udang, orange cake, nasi ayam, etc. Those are definitely to die for! I maybe kinda bias here but both my sisters are too and my mother in law, she's brilliant! We're lucky that we know how to value food and eat, cook and indulge people with our cooking. 

So yeah, as of today, as usual me being the busy 'hungry' student and husband's being the usual ultra-rajin made this beautiful and ridiculously good dish, grilled salmon with baked potatoes and dill sauce. And I don't simply dig this sorta dish if we're out dining in some good restaurants or what. Simply because there are gazillions vegetables present in this dish and salmon being cooked with the existence of soy sauce. But boy I was wrong, it was beyond words! And again husband nailed it! Way, way, way better than what we had anywhere else. :)

I'm proud of him and I believed it does boost his confidence in cooking as well. I am his judge and also his lab rat, but I'm super fine with that. After all, cooking it's definitely a combination of having good skills, common sense & passion about it. ;)

Always in my mind

I am thankful to Allah (s.w.t.), to me late dad, to Mia, to Zorro, to Toby, (in a way) to me late father-in-law and to those destructive persons for what ever positions that I am being today. And to me husband and me close family, they are the one that keeps me 'running' after all the ups & downs that I have been through. :'(

temporary-break-down-due-to-missing-those-whom-I-loved-dearly

Eid in the Park

Ramadhan in Melbourne has been good for both of us. Being a women myself, I've grown accustomed to fasting apart from the month of Ramadhan but not for most man, I think. But praise to Allah, it was an eased Ramadhan this time for both us. Maturity has finally kicked in, perhaps? ;)

When Shaliz told us that there will be Eid prayer in the park, we were so damn eager to be part of this event. I did a bit of reading about it and was surprised that it was actually a sunnah by our Prophet Muhammad s.a.w. to perform Eid prayer in an open space apart from in mosque which is very common in Malaysia. But we had a really great time though. It was a peaceful Sunday morning, in a luscious greenery, no words can describe how peaceful it was. And how great the feeling was to be able to enjoyed the many rezqi Allah has given us. My thought went to me late dad, my family & my husband's family. InsyaAllah, we have a really big plan for you guys!

Will continue with my Eid post very soon. I need to take a break for a while. Lol.

Zorro

Meet Zorro the cat. :)

The Unofficial Merisik

Last raya, the whole family was quite surprised with the unofficial merisik for my aunt and kenal-berkenalan session between our family and the guy's family. Alhamdulillah it went well. :)

So my family have asked us (knowing that we're doing this kinda thing with Fabulous Floral) to do a simple decor of buah tangan they got for the guy's family in order to return their favor. And here's what I did using the freshest flower I can possibly get, from my grandma's garden. ;)

Well anyway Salam Aidil-adha to all my Muslim friends & family! :)

Recipe: Nei Urundhai (Simple Laddu)

Made nei urundhai for my mum today since she loves this manisan so much. :)

Nei Urundhai (Simple Laddu)

Ingredients:

450g of Nei Urundhai flour

125g of Ghee

5-10 pcs of Crushed cardamom + 1 inch ginger (pound together)

40g of Cashew nuts

50g of Raisins/Mixed fruits

Method:

1. Toast the Nei Urundhai flour until slightly brown.

2. Sauté a bit the raisins/mixed fruits together with cashew nuts, crushed cardamom & ginger with a little bit of ghee and put aside. (Mix A)

3. Warm the ghee until it melts and put aside.

4. Stir together the flour and Mix A.

5. Add melted ghee and immediately roll the the flour into small balls.

Happy Diwali to my friends and family! :)

Goodbye

Toe (featuring Toki Asako) - Goodbye

A soothing sound for the loss that we had to bear. Goodbye to me dad... :'(

Thanks to my husband for playing this beautiful tunes this morning...

The loss of me dad...

23.10.1958 - 15.10.2011

No words can describe our feelings right now... 

Over the loss that we had to bear.

The loss of me dad. ;(

But Alhamdulillah (all praise is due to Allah) that all of us (my mum, my two sisters, my husband and I) are there with me dad until his very final moment. And Alhamdulillah too that we managed to segerakan his funeral matter, as per his wish when he was still alive.

Du'a. Al-Fatihah. Yassin. To me dad.

p.s.: Happy 53rd Birthday Dad. We love and miss you so much.

Recipe: Moist Orange Cake

My dad is currently on his (strict) diabetic diet. Hence I baked something that is less sweet for him and my family, for our iftar together yesterday. Since he loves orange cake, I found a simple and yummy version of moist orange cake recipe from allrecipes.co.uk :)

Moist Orange Cake

Ingredients:

110g of unsalted butter

2/3 cup of caster sugar

2 tbsp of grated orange zest

2 egg yolks

1 cup of self raising flour

125ml of fresh orange juice (roughly I used around 2 oranges)

2 egg whites

A pinch of salt

Methods:

1. Preheat oven to 180 degree of Celsius. Grease one 20cm of round baking tin.

2. Sift flour and set aside.

3. Cream butter, sugar and grated orange zest until light and fluffy. 

4. Beat in the egg yolks one at a time.

5. Fold in sifted flour, alternating with orange juice.

6. In another bowl, whisk egg whites until stiff and add a pinch of salt.

7. Fold whisked egg whites into the mixtures and spoon it into the prepared tin.

8. Bake in the preheated oven for 35 - 40 minutes or until the cake tester came out clean.

As for me, I just dust off sieved icing sugar on top of the cake instead of topping it with butter-cream icing in attempt to reduce the amount of sugar for the sake of me dad. :) And I must say the cake turned out beautiful and tasty too. Perfect texture, sort of very light and moist cake. As for the taste of the cake, it came out very rich but still maintained a great balance of orange flavor in it. 

Good luck! And Eid Mubarak to all Muslims! :)

A gift of love, perhaps?

Me Ma is a very practical person and I'm thinking of giving her practical gifts for the upcoming Mother's day (I seriously hope she tak baca this particular post)

So I'm thinking of preparing something like below for her.

(source)

(source)

And maybe I can add-up say, a not-too-sweet orange cake perhaps? :)

Catching up

I wished I have extra hands and brains and time for me to get things done for the upcoming anniversary, mother's day and Feena's baby shower. :(

And dear god, please spare me dad. Thanks.

God's alleged

In the midst of busyness,
I'm another year old,
In the midst of hecticness,
My dad went down with a heart attack...

Pray that we're always stay strong and positive,
And pray that he'll be alright...

I love you dad xox